We are the Champions. Nya nya Florida

From Dave Barry

California - I came out here because I’ve been reading disturbing reports that my state, Florida, is about to lose the coveted title of “The Doofus State,” which we Floridians worked so hard to win following the 2000 presidential election by not being able to figure out whom we voted for.

We have been The Doofus State for just two lousy years, and now these greedy Californians, who had the title for decades, are trying to get it back. < A HA HA HA Florida, we Californians mock and scoff your pathetic attempts at lunacy! >

I regret to say that they have an excellent shot. The political situation out here is very bad.

Q. How bad is it?

A. One of the saner-sounding people involved is Larry Flynt.

More!

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Howard Dean endorses Gray Davis

Presidential candidate Howard Dean Saturday urged Californians to vote against the effort to oust Gov. Gray Davis, calling it part of a plan by right-wing Republicans to subvert democracy.

“I think this is the fourth attempt to undermine democracy in this country by the right wing of the Republican Party since the 2000 elections,” said Dean.

Other examples, he said, were the refusal by the “conservative-dominated United States Supreme Court” to order a recount of the votes in Florida during the 2000 presidential election and separate GOP-led redistricting efforts in Colorado and Texas that could result in a loss of seats currently held by Democrats.

“I believe the right wing of the Republican Party is deliberately undermining the democratic underpinnings of this country,” Dean told a news conference.

I like this. Dean is telling the truth and being bold in doing so.  He, the frontrunner in the Democratic race, is taking pointblank aim at the extremists who have hijacked the Republican Party. With the exception of Al Sharpton, none of the other Democratic candidates including Kucinich, are attacking this hard.

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Bush seeks an exit strategy as war threatens his career

The President will make a dramatic U-turn on Iraq in a  broadcast tonight to try to salvage his hopes of re-election amid Americans’ growing hostility to the casualties and chaos. George Bush will attempt tonight to convince the American people that he has a workable ‘exit strategy’ to free his forces from the rapidly souring conflict in Iraq,

Golly George, you lied to us for months about the reasons for war and falsified information. Heck when the facts got in the way you just made stuff up, didn’t you? So tell me, why should anyone believe a word you say now?

And if you need more convincing that the Bushies can’t even find the clue train, must less get on board.

U.S. struggling to identify enemy

After four months of military occupation, and in the midst of what most military officials still describe as a war, U.S. commanders and defense officials say they do not have a clear understanding of who they are now fighting.

Well that’s just great. Our supposedly mighty army can’t even figure out who the enemy is! These are the same great thinkers who believed Iraq would offer no resistance since they would be so happy to see us. Tell me, is there anything Bush and the chicken hawks have judged correctly about the Iraq War?

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