As always, Barry is hilarious. A few excerpts:
Obama, having secured North and South America, flies to Germany without using an airplane and gives a major speech — speaking English and German simultaneously — to 200,000 mesmerized Germans, who immediately elect him chancellor, prompting France to surrender.
In noneconomic news, a Las Vegas jury convicts O.J. Simpson on 12 counts of being an unbelievable idiot. He faces more than 60 years in jail, which could end his relentless quest to find the killer of the people he stabbed to death in 1994.
The National Bureau of Declaring Things That Make You Go “Duh” declares that the nation has been in a recession since December 2007.
In another troubling note, US intelligence sources report that Iran is developing “a gigantic rocket-powered shoe.”