Elders of Zion to retire

elders of zion
The Elders of Zion in their wild and crazy days

Well, it’s the end of an era, isn’t it? The wingnuts will have to find a new conspiracy to foam at the mouth about.

The Elders of Zion, the venerable and shadowy Jewish organization that controls the international banking industry, news media and Hollywood, has announced that it is disbanding so that members can retire to Florida and live out their golden years on the golf course.

But wait… Maybe that’s just what they want you to believe and instead are plotting another takeover of international finance and will repeat their ploy of cleverly having most bank CEOs be WASPs so as to fool everyone. The fiends.

“I always used to complain that Jews ran the world,” said Reginald Weber, author of “Zionists and Zookeepers: The Unholy Alliance.” “But now I’m starting to worry that nobody’s in charge.”

  • Probably get their brains transplanted into the bodies of young females.

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