The perfect gift for the paranoid imperialist!

The Talon Riot Control Vehicle, now on eBay!

“Fully bulletproof all round to withstand sustained fire from a Kalashnikov AK47, has 3 engines, one the main 8.2L turbo-diesel drive engine, the second a diesel generator to power 240V and the 11000V electrified hull outside, and a Nissan gasoline car engine to power the water cannon.

600 gallon water tank, full 180 degree remote controlled water cannon, separate tanks for the addition of skin irritant and/or dye.

11000V electrified panels and grilles to discourage climbers.”

Lots more too!

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Martha indicted, resigns

“Martha Stewart resigned Wednesday as chairman and CEO of the company she founded, just hours after a federal indictment accused her and her former stockbroker of lying to investigators who were probing her profitable sale of ImClone Systems stock.”

Would the feds have indicted Martha Stewart if she were a man? Sure. Does her arrogant manner make people want to kick as she’s going down? Absolutely. And people are less accepting of arrogance in a woman than in a man.

Even with that, what really honks off the feds is they think she lied to them. They hate that. They hate that a lot. So she’s been charged with nine counts, including obstructing justice.

Expect a splashy show trial, with accompanying media frenzy.

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Sympathetic judge gives pot guru one day in jail

“Showing unexpected leniency, a judge sentenced “ganja guru” Ed Rosenthal on Wednesday to a day in jail for growing marijuana in violation of federal law because the pot advocate believed its cultivation was allowed under California law.

U.S. District Judge Charles Breyer said he gave the light sentence because of the “extraordinary circumstances” of the case, referring to the fact that growing marijuana for medical purposes is legal under a voter-approved California law.”

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What running for President has become

“When Dick Gephardt told me a few months ago that he spends seven to eight hours a day, seven days a week making fundraising calls, I was so shocked I had to ask him to repeat it just to make sure I had heard him right.

And keep in mind that in between those fundraising calls, Gephardt has to campaign for president, fly around the country, give speeches, eat, sleep and, oh, yeah, every now and then drop by Congress and do his day job representing the people from the 3rd District of Missouri”.

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