You might wish to rethink…

You might wish to rethink that Australian vacation

An Australian woman said she was picking roses outside her home on the outskirts of Brisbane when a large kangaroo pushed her down and then kicked, bit and scratched her.

Neighbors said they have been terrorized in recent years by a mob of about 50 kangaroos.

When interviewed by Fox News, a high ranking White House staffer said “the kangaroos had obviously been trained by al-Qaida to hate freedom”, warned Australians to be on guard against duck-billed platypuses with suicide bomber belts, and added that tax cuts for the wealthy would solve the terrorism problem.