Turnabout is fair play
More email from the mysterious Scarlet Pimpernel —
Inspired by the loss of his TV show to an angry outburst at a caller, here’s my attempt last night to provoke Michael Savage off the radio.
MS: Okay, I wanna hear from you callers out there, the ones who were raised by leftist parents… all you red-diaper doper babies out there. I wanna hear if you liked them, if they screwed you up, whatever. Our first call’s from Justin in Los Angeles. Justin, welcome to the Savage Nation.
Justin (S.P.): Hi Michael. I’m definitely one of those kids-of-leftists you’re talking about. My father was very big into civil rights and poverty issues back in the sixties. I hate to disappoint you though: he wasn’t really a hippie or anything like that, he was more a nerdy kind of activist, you know, the kind with short hair…
Justin: And I guess, ‘cuz he spent a lot of time trying to help out other people and causes and the like, he wasn’t really home all that much, or not as much as he could’ve been, and I know it must’ve had some impact on the family, but y’know what?
Justin: You aren’t fit to lick his boots.
MS: (enraged) What?! What the hell do you know about me? What the hell do you know about anything? You don’t know anything about me, about what I’ve done… about my work in nutrition, in conservation… anything! How would you know anything about me?
Justin: Well, I hear what you say on the radio…
MS: You don’t know anything! You’re just stupid, like the rest of them, what do you know?
Justin: I’ve heard your mother still cries when you try to seduce her…
MS: WHAT! YOU BASTARD! You FILTHY FILTHY BASTARD! You just come here and say that! You just come down to the studio… any time any place, I swear to god you filthy, filthy miserable leftist commie son of a bitch… (etc. etc. for another minute or two…)
Since the show’s on a seven second delay I’m sure they cut my last line off the air, but there was no question he heard it. Damn near had an aneurysm. Maybe next time.
I highly suggest you try this sometime: call into the Michael Savage show, talk your way past the screener and just say something intensely cruel to him. You wouldn’t believe how satisfying it is.