Obama picks Bill Ayers as Secretary of Defense

Bursting with post-election glee, Mr. Ayers revealed that he has indeed been advising Barack Obama all along, even in such matters as his election night appearance. “Who do you think told Michelle to dress the whole family in red and black?” asked Mr. Ayers. “Way to subliminally convey our radical egalitarian, anarcho-communist values!” Mr. Ayers says he looks forward to implementing further “right-on” changes.

It was on the Internet so it must be true.