From reader Pat:
I don’t know if you’ve seen this:
This would be wildly expensive and essentially useless Department of Homeland Security funding to stop terrorists from attacking cows and other hideous perils like that.
My own modest proposal–have Homeland Security hire all 14 million of us unemployed–we could begin checking bathtubs around the country immediately. Two problems solved!
I’m thinking there could be terrorists disguised as prairie dogs lurking in the supposedly innocent-looking field behind our house. DHS should give me massive funding to monitor and defend against the impending menace of prairie dogs with suicide belts.